Don’t Let Them Tame You

Don't Let Them Tame You Lisa Valentine That British Betty Blog

I‘m not entirely sure who ‘they’ are but they do seem to crop up a lot in these kinds of quotes. The full quote is ‘You were once wild here. Don’t let them tame you‘ by Isadora Duncan. It’s one that’s stuck with me since I first read it after falling headfirst into a Pinterest black hole one night.

It’s a fact of life that we all conform in some way or another. As we frantically attempt to find our place in the world, there is a universal understanding that we are expected to live by a certain ethos. But what I’m talking about here is that fragile little fire that lives inside our bellies (I don’t mean indigestion btw).

There is something incredibly sad about meeting someone who has been so broken down by others that they have resigned themselves to be something that they aren’t in order to live a quiet life. Society likes to keep us tame. It definitely doesn’t like wildness nor encourages it in any capacity.

Wildness and rebellion are definitely not words that any of my friends would associate with Lisa Valentine these days (and given that I choose to spend most of my free time wrapped up in a blanket watching Netflix and drinking tea with my cats, who can blame them really).

I’m a born introvert and am submissive to a fault sometimes. My inner confidence doesn’t manifest as loud and ‘in your face’ obnoxious; it’s a quietly assured feeling deep down that I am valid and worthy and that my voice deserves to be heard.

Historically, I spent a long time tamed and even started to censor my blog a couple of years ago, knowing that the beady eyes of the past would always be lurking in the shadows. They’d spend precious time scanning these very pages, just waiting for any crumb of information to be twisted and regurgitated to suit their own narrative of who I am.

Then I remembered that writing is my small act of wildness. I love to write; it’s what keeps my own internal fire glowing. It’s taken me a long time to learn who I am underneath all of the previous conditioning and internalised bullshit but I know my worth and will not be silenced or shrink please others.

Some people always will always try to keep you in a space that makes them feel comfortable. This usually occurs through some deep-rooted insecurity that they have, a desperate need to stamp on other people’s fire to make themselves feel better.

So I don’t know who else needs to hear this but you are absolutely allowed to be yourself – loudly or quietly, authentically and unapologetically.

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